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Related article: Date: Thursday, July 3, 2003 13 28th EDT 15 From: Aterovis aol. com Subject: shiny things Come to the confusion - Part 3 Bright Things Come to confusion Part 3 of 4 We stood there and stared at each another, which seemed to be forever, or we speak of a word. The silence between us, until there was a impenetrable wall. Good work, Seth. You really screwed this royal n. I'm alone when Cole broke down the wall of collapse as in a single sentence : ". I think maybe we should start " I nodded vigorously, willing to accept what proposals. "Are we going to sit down again ? " I asked timidly. said walking back to rocking and set to the same as had been decided. Do not swing this time, just watched in silence , when I sat by his side, not looking for a second. "I wanted to hear from you for so long," he said after a time. " It almost seems as if only a dream. " I do not know what came over me, but I found myself reaching over Cole and a pinch on the arm. " Ouch ! " He cried. " is not a dream," he said with a smile. He smiled suddenly, his face lit up, now familiar way. "Wow," he said with a sigh of happiness. " I like her ? " N I smiled and nodded shyly. We had some dizziness students. He laughed heartily. "I can not believe I thought I hated because he had heard that I was gay. " " I was scared, near you, because I thought it would be find am gay. " \\ \\ n laughed again. I had a million questions, and I could not keep them in more. "People know you're gay? " " Yes, I thought everyone knew. I'm not sure it holds Secret. " " I had no idea. " " I thought Brooke had said, if nothing else. " "Brooke knows? " " Yes, we are two students with pride. " \\ \\ n "What is that? " " is the Alliance Gay / Straight in school. " " We have a " "You have to learn a lot today, right? " he said with a smile. "It's a great group. You must come someTime. " "Wait! Slow down. I do not think I'm ready for that. You are only the third person does not even know me. " " Hey, it's great. Everyone needs their own pace. That's like rule number one in the pride of the students. " " I do not know if I ever will want. Nobody bothers you? Preteen Lolita Top " shrugged. " I guess that depends on your definition of harass. I get the name sometimes, but really does not bother me. I am more than a couple of times has been depressed, but I went to the principal on both occasions, and took charge of them. We are very pleased that they have a not very strict - the policy of harassment at school. No. In most cases, not really cares that I like. " that I never expected it to be maybe so. I was surprised, that this happened right under my nose and called me to in my misery, I had it all was lost. n I lost a minute in my own thoughts. When I looked, was just me. "What? "I asked, suddenly self -conscious. " You're so sweet," she said softly. " I? " I cried. " Yes, you. " "No way. I am weak and stupid and would never do my hair, all that I say so. " He laughed. "I love your hair is so adorable you so. adorable. You know how many times I forget the lines, because 'm looking at you ? " " Really? " \\ \\ N "really. " " Wow. ever thought. I always thought were the most nice guy I've ever seen. blushed :" I, as I said the words. It felt so odd, talking out loud, especially Cole everyone. He said nothing for a minute and I was horrified I went too far. "I, I say my lines, " he said quietly. "What? " I asked in surprise. up and turned towards me. The moonlight fell upon the face of his s like a spotlight. He began to speak softly, his voice is slow strength, while delivering their lines of the play with an intensity that had never n it. grow "MattersING are not ripe until the season, "he said," So, as a young man, as yet ripe to reason. And now it's the point of the human capacity to reason is the quarterback, and wrote my will take me to their eyes, I love stories o'erlook richest book of love. " My breath caught in his throat as the familiar words took the new meaning speaks directly to me. When he finished, my heart was beating a tattoo on his voice almost drowned. gradually began to step n to me, every step Preteen Lolita Top was closer to my heart beat faster. that stopped in front of me, so close he could heat his body in the fresh feel air n. the night he looked up, his heart in his throat. began to dip up to me, seemingly in slow motion. I was totally lost their point of view n. his lips slowly n by me. was my first kiss was one of the guys my dreams. let go chains to pull him closer. and left us suddenly. we dropped to the dusty ground with a thud, my legs still trappedclumsily hard on the swing and landed on my chest Cole. " Wow," I growled. " Oh, my God, I'm sorry," said Cole, struggling in vain n unravel. Suddenly, the situation amused me and I began to laugh. After a few seconds, Cole came laughter, until the construction of n Cole howled again and collapsed on my chest. Finally, we have were laughing at us, but we were elsewhere, so for some time catch my breath, so your body a nice pressure against mine. I had no complaints. Finally, it is inserted into the elbows and looked down to me. " I can not believe this really happened," she whispered. " Do I have to pinch back ?" I asked with a smile. smiled back, then slowly bent down to kiss each other. This n was not interrupted by the gravitational force, which was much more satisfying. After a minute, he broke the kiss gently. I let out a quiet moan disappointment, I do not want it to end. I was happier thanI would be there and Dad was gone from our lives and never return. I never thought I n always happy again. " This is probably not the best place to do this," he said with a laugh. "I do not mind," I said, trying to kiss her again, but moved again with a smile. " What if someone catches us ? " I had not thought of. I was suddenly very aware that Cole was on me lying on it in the center of the playground s. "Yeah, okay. Good point," he admitted. Cole managed to get there, then he took my hand and helped me to unravel of the oscillation. He took me to my feet, and we were there and stared at the n in the eyes, our bodies almost touching, but not quite. I saw him, continued to hand and looked down. He followed my gaze. He cleared his throat nervously. "So good, because you're like me and I s you like... " He paused and breathed deeply. "You and a friend of my s ? " I felt my eyes open. Wow. I was not sure if I was ready for it yet. Students startedtter, "Oh, wow... I mean... Whoa... I did not expect... " I breathed deeply of his own and forced me to speak coherently. The Shining " I can think of n around and get back with you ? " Directly through their eyes hurt. He released my hand, as when burned, and took a step back. " Never mind," he muttered. N "It was a stupid question. " "It was a stupid question," he said quickly. "I just do All this is happening a bit fast here. A couple of hours I have not even You know, gay. Hell, a few days ago I could not admit that was me. I only have time to soak in all this, you know? " was a bit spasmodic gesture, but I realized I was really excited yet. I took a step closer to him. "Cole, you know, I like you. Kiss is amazing. I have never felt much. All this is only really new n to me. Please try to understand. " He relaxed visibly. " I'm sorry. 're Right. " He took my hands in the back and pressed against his chest. " Take all the time you need. So pleasesay yes when you think about it. " I laughed and leaned against him. He released my hands and slid to be close to my back and hugged me. I felt really good. " Kissing You was pretty amazing to me too, " the hair of my s. I head tilted to one side and smiled. quickly bowed to and kissed me. not for a long kiss, just a sweet bus short. "I think, better than being at home," he said after a few minutes are that sustains me. sighed. "Yeah, I guess so," I said sheepishly. \\ \\ n None of us move. " we'll have to leave the time," he whispered. " Yes, but not yet," he whispered again. n his arms over me. We were there for a little more minutes, before moving smoothly. put his arms around me, a hands rested lightly on my hips. n " takes so much has changed today," he said, looked into his eyes. " All for the better, I hope," he said with a wry smile. "Absolutely. " I went around my hipsand gave me a gentle nudge in the to Leah 's house. " Unless we begin to walk, we will never go to the ", he said. I laughed when I got it, and we went on the road hand in hand. As we Preteen Lolita Top approached, but Leah, I left his side. He looked at Preteen Lolita Top me curiously. " I'm not willing to know another person," he said simply. grimaced. "I want to shout from the roof. " He laughed in my surprised expression. "But," he added quickly. " I will wait until the it is ready. " I smiled and opened the passenger door. As I climbed in, I thought how different it was in his car, as it was, it was the same day in the school parking lot. Now I knew he was gay, and I knew he was too. And not only that, but we kissed ! It seemed so unreal to me. As he walked away from the curb, the questions that had been pushed hand at the beginning of the evening began again. " Have you had a boyfriend before? " I asked. " Yes Twice ", hs quiet. "What is it? " " Well, that was my last dating experience a disaster. " " Oh, sorry... " "No, okay. I used to be. he was an idiot. he has deceived me, I threw it. it hurt at the time, but I'm fine now. and learning to live. " "What about the others? " smiled sadly. "You could say that one is bittersweet. " " What do you mean ? " " I liked, it was sweet and funny and nice, we had a lot. Fun together. it was n it was nice to someone who really knew me. that big. But I had to hear from anyone around us afraid, and that s not great. sniffing and lying was old very quickly. " "What happened? " "was too. We began to argue about stupid things, and the end we parted. " I thought about that for a minute. "You not only get in the same thing again to me," he said. looked at me and shrugged. " I do not know. Can I ? " "I'm not willing to meet people. " ", do not you think,throughout the school. " " I do not know if anyone is willing to say. " " You have told me. " " That was another thing. white " " Brooke. " " What did he say? "I had wanted to be ready to annoy, if n. " No, "he said quickly. " At least not exactly. Our students pride meeting earlier this week, said something about a friend who was having difficulty with the assumption that they are gay. I did not join them with you until you told me tonight. " " Oh, "I said, somewhat mollified, but still a little upset, she I mentioned at all. N " has to stop, so defensive, "said quietly. "It is a Many people will help if you let him. " " I 'm not used to people close to me. " " I 've noticed. But is that how you want the rest of his life life? " My response was quick. "No! " " Then you have to let people in to begin with, they hope to start me. " I turned around and looked at his face in light of the dashboard, while was going. I was sobeautiful. It was hard for me to believe that it was me. It seemed too good to be true. I was afraid that if I can believe me, I could be so happy, something terrible happen to me. I was not happy. That's the way it s is. No? He was so long that all I knew was unhappy. "Is it possible that fear of happiness? " I asked, almost under my breath. the mouth down into the corners. "I think so," he replied, thoughtful. "And I think the only thing that separates a lot of people to be really happy. As it is there within reach, if s only willing to take risks and let it happen. " I sighed. "I think I have to think a lot at night. No matter s what happened, but hopefully we can be friends. " "me too", he said, and handed me a small smile. "And if I remain the hope of something more than friends, well, just deal with it. " I laughed. " Baby steps," he said. He laughed too. " As we move in the same dction. " entered my house, and suddenly I was nervous. What was the protocol here? We were not friends, but we had kissed. Is this the kiss me now ? What if n mom in the window of what has happened ? that can quickly for the doorknob. "Seth ? "Cole said quickly. " I... I liked tonight. Think about what you said, right? "N I nodded, with his hand on the handle, ready to make a run for it, if do not make any sudden movements. " I really like kiss good night, but it is pretty obvious, like you feel about it, " chuckled. " Well, good evening. Give me hands if we are friends, and Cole is changed again, "he said, paraphrase Puck closing speech. I smiled and felt relaxed. I took a quick look at the house, , and seeing no one in the windows, I took Cole 's hand in mine and leaned back in for a brief kiss. would not let go of your hand now, which give a soft grip before reluctantly, as I open the door n curves. "which is about? oon "He asked hopefully. " Count on it, "he said, was with another of their rewards smiles lighting. almost floating inside. remember I I could never have the sense of it. I rolled on my natural high all the way to my room where I dropped back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. When I was in the ten, I 'm obsessed with astronomy. dad had bought me a telescope and then helped me to paint my roof black with small star carefully applied represented by that glow in the dark paint. the light in the center of the room sun and paint that could fit in any situation. I had been a purist n precision and was taken once and for all. Since dad left, I had thought of painting a couple of times about it, but not can really bring myself to do so. However, it was on my galaxy roof I see now, my mind had lost so much about the real stars in the n. "Hello, Earth to Seth," a raspy voice brought me back to the Earth. WiThout, I turned my head to find Kane standing in my the door, a bemused expression on his face. "Welcome back," he joked. " Bite me," he said with a silly grin. " No, thanks", shot him again. "I'm going to leave his friend. " "What? " I gasped and sat down with a jerk. "How... I mean... No has a friend ! " Kane laughed. "Chill out, Seth. Just kidding. " My heart was in my throat as I stared at my little brother. "Well, , it was not funny. " I was hoping to sound stern, but not full of tears. Kane was all laugh more. I continued to glow until n calm. " So, as today the night go? " He asked again, what would be his new serenity. n " What do you mean ?" he said defensively. n rolled his eyes. " Practice game ? You have been a nervous wreck before leaving. Or was it just because his name was called you wearing? " " Cole, his name is Cole. " \\ \\ n Kane smirked. "So it was Cole who were nervous. " growled a warning. "Oh, come on. I want to know what is happening is that you act in all goofy " " nothing has happened. And I was not acting silly. " \\ \\ n " Yes you do. Something obvious happened and I wonder, that. please tell me ? " n "I do not talk about it. " "Please Seth? "He gave me puppy dog ​​eyes and I felt that the type in not used to wear, but if I did not say exactly, is not. "I am your little brother! " " Well," he annoyed me. "But to come to close the door. " smiled triumphantly, as he Preteen Lolita Top closed the door and got into bed with me. "What happened?" He asked impatiently. " The practice was very good," he began slowly. " Everyone knows, its parts very well now and we all feel much better about the game. " " Yes, yes, yes," interrupted Kane. "Can we, much of the n ow? " gave him a playful shove. "Who is telling this story? " " Of course not, or who would be in good part. " I laughed. "Okay, okay. After training, Leah had rentedFilm and n invited to stay to see it. I did not want, but Brooke has Cole offered to take me home. " " Mmmhmm "Kane said, moving his eyebrows suggestively. I felt my cheeks hot and I knew I was blushing. " Anyway, "I continued. " when we were asked if we could Cole for a ride. " " Mmmhmm "Kane said it again. " Look, you always want to interrupt the little comment ? " laughed. " Well, I'll stop. I promise. " " As I said, I asked if we could take a walk and I agreed, , but I was very nervous. So we went to this little park at the end of the street, and he asked me why I was avoid it. I told him I was not there. "Kane snorted and shot a warning glance. I took a deep breath. " Then he asked me if it was because he is gay. "N "I knew it! "Kane shouted and stood up. " Do you mind? " " Not at all. What happens next? " He said, Preteen Lolita Top practically jumping in their enthusiasm. " Do you kiss? " " Kane ", exclaimed in shock. " What? have? " " I... that... We... " " You have, right? "He sang. 'Quiet! "I hissed. jumped back in bed, jumped up and down all the time ". Seth and Cole sitting in a tree, "he began to sing. grabbed a pillow and pushed it over the face. " It will be down! By God, you will here Mama do not stop. " that was relaxed and I pulled the pillow. " Sorry, I just got you to look forward, "he said with a smile. " a little excited, if you ask me. " suddenly sobered Preteen Lolita Top and sat down. " Seth, who does not understand. They have it for me for so long - always trying to do sure I had everything I needed and I was happy - but no one was there to make you happy. It's really wonderful to see, find someone you like that makes you feel good. " I suddenly felt a small tear. I grabbed him and pulled him to n me a big hug. " Then, " he asked after a second. " How was the kiss? " I laughed and pushed him. I wiped my eyes and decidedonly to give in and go with it. "It was unbelievable," he sighed with pleasure. " Do you have your tongue? " " None of your business. " " Really? " He moved back to the puppy dog ​​eyes. " Yes " I replied with a blush. " Have you done this? " " Kane" I cried. "I can not believe you asked me that! Of course not " chuckled. "I was just a joke. But seriously, that is, like, friends now? " " No," I said slowly, drawing the word. "I asked, but I said, I had to think about it. " "What is important? You like, it looks like... enough for me. " N " this is it, though. not so simple. Preteen Lolita Top Maybe if is even, it would be, but are not. " " Well, duh. Thanks for the breaking news. Why is not simple? " " Okay, look. If you want to keep a girl, just ask and if she says yes... "\\ \\ n " What do you mean by" if " ? " "... if she says yes, you can walk the halls at school holding hands and no one unmoved. But if I say yes to Cole, then weto be very careful. There are plenty of people out there who do not like gay people. You can make life very difficult for us, or even pain. " " Then do not keep their hands at school. " " There are other reasons. " " Like what? "N " I just accepted that I'm gay, I do not know if I'm ready to jump right into someone to be friends. " " I do not know unless you try. " Preteen Lolita Top " And Mom and Dad? " " Huh ? " That gave short. I began to think he had a answer to everything. " What you have to do with it ? "n " I need to know what happened to Dad. When Mom was he really out, because he was gay, then you really are upset when they learned that I n was. It was hard enough to do more than be in all those years ago when I was and friends. How much more difficult is when I have a friend? " " How did you hear about my father? "N " I will try to find it. " Kane eyes were opened throughout the year. " What? "N " I do not know exactly. I think I might start with the phone book. "N Kane was out of the room in an instant, and the back of the phone book almost as fast. We turned quickly to the C and found Connelly. da s were several calls in our area, but no names Adam. "Maybe he does not stay in the area," ventured Kane. ", or has a secret number," I thought. " What now ? " " I do not know. Any ideas ? " " Do you know where he went when he left here? " I'm back. " No. It was right next door, while waiting for the bus In the morning," he said. "with Mr. Grant and Mrs. Lydia? " " Yes. " " You may know where he went. " "The question is, where is " the marsh had moved into the house next door a few months before Dad left. It quickly became mom and dad and have here quite often. After it was Dad, Mom suddenly do not have much time with them. They had moved the district within a year. went in the phone book, and this time we beat a of gold. Marsh Award was living in the phone book in the previousnearest town on n. I copied the number on a pad of paper and put it in a safe place. I could not name now, it was too late, but I would call the next chance I got. " It's a boy then," I said and looked at the clock. "It's better than a bed. " N "It's a Friday night, I get up early in the morning," , argued. " What do you want ? Stay up all night? " N "I always want to talk to you. " " About what? " n smiled. " I want to know more about the kiss. " N I threw a pillow at him, dodged with ease. "No way, Jose " I said I felt my cheeks color. " Oh, come on," said begging. "You are my brother. You I say these things. How else would like to know what to expect from my first kiss? " " Well, unless you are on the planning kiss a man, not much likeness. " grimaced. "Good, good. But what you do with it him? " sighed. "I do not know yet, and I really do not want to talk about it s no longer exists. " " Well, in this case, I think I'm goingto bed, "he said. He began the door, but then lifted the pillow that had thrown him, and gave me a solid punch in the face. " We hope that some sense deleted that " he said with a smirk. he was out the door before he could react. a few seconds, the door again, just enough to Kane his head through the door" for the record "he said in a serious tone. " I think that you should go for it. "He closed the door and left me alone with my thoughts. To be continued... ----------------- ---------------- --- More about the Author: n Josh Aterovis, a twentysomething artist - writer, was born in the breeding and n Eastern Shore of Maryland and lives there with her partner, Jon. Aterovis is a Latin pseudonym meaning " black sheep. " Every time someone asked Josh when he was a child what he wanted to be, if , said an author. has a lot of it looks strange, but he never expected , it is true that there Preteen Lolita Top was only one of the things a child says. in 1999, JoshFUL dream came true when he began writing a story send it via Internet. Bleeding Heart deep resonance with readers, , who encourages him to seek liberation, and in 2001, was the story published by Renaissance Alliance Publishing, Inc. as the best Whodunit n the year 2002 with Stonewall - society, Bleeding Hearts was the first book of Killian Kendall mystery series. reap the whirlwind, his second book with the amateur detective Killian Kendall , 5th May 2003. Josh has completed four books in the series and is currently working on the fifth. He has many awards for his writing and his website, which also has its n art gallery very welcome : www. steliko. com / bleedinghearts. E -mail information Aterovis aol. com
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